IN THE RING OF LIFE: WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT COUNSELLING? PART III

MYTHS ABOUT THE COUNSELLING PRACTICE

This is the third and final part of our write-ups on What do you know about Counselling? In this post, we address some myths about the counselling practice and reasons why we need to debunk them. If you missed the first two posts, please read them via insert links; https://reflectiveseedsbycounsellorseyram.blogspot.com/2024/08/in-ring-of-life-what-do-you-know-about.html; https://reflectiveseedsbycounsellorseyram.blogspot.com/2024/07/in-ring-of-life-what-do-you-know-about.html

A number of myths are associated with Counselling services and this breeds stigma sometimes and also prevents individuals who are in dire need of counselling from seeking out the service. We will discuss some of such myths and why it is important to diffuse them from our minds if we genuinely require counselling to boost our functionality.

Myth 1: Counselling is giving advice. One of the biggest confusion and challenges associated with Counselling is the thought that it is advice giving. Advice is basically sharing your concerns with an individual(s) with the conviction that the person (s) will tell you what to do and how to do it though you may not always agree with that position. The giver of such advice may not consider the emotional and psychological impact of the advice, is not responsible for the resultant effects and may even coerce the individual to accept their preferred choice. In contrast, counselling involves the concerned person engaging with the counsellor and actively participating in exploring, understanding and resolving the problem. Decision making rests solely on the counsellee as he or she ought to take responsibility for the choices made and decisions taken while taking cognizance of the emotional and psychological impact on his or her wellbeing.

Myth 2: Counselling is expensive and never ends. Depending on the disorder, counselling may involve about four to twelve or more therapeutic sessions to stablise the condition of the client. As any health service which is cost incentive, it is a specialised healthcare provision for resolution of minor psychological problems, relationship, educational or occupational issues and everyday concerns. The duration for therapy depends on several factors; thus, it may be long or short-term with unique cost considerations.

Myth 3: Counselling is for “crazy people”. Counselling is most beneficial to clients who are dealing with minor psychological, emotional, social, occupational, financial concerns, grief and others. Severe psychotic conditions are handled directly by psychiatrists. At best, a Counsellor would refer such severe cases to the psychiatrist or propose a joint treatment plan where the therapy is combined with medication prescribed solely by the psychiatrist where applicable.

Myth 4: Counselling is not needed because mental health condition is not a sickness. Mental Health conditions affect the functionality of the brain and subsequently other parts of the body. It is a serious health concern that requires as much attention as other debilitating and chronic conditions such as diabetes, hypertension, cancer and others. There should be no hesitation to seek therapy for recovery when one experiences mental health concerns.

Myth 5: Counselling is for weak people who are damaged emotionally. Counselling is intended to empower individuals overcome difficulties by using therapeutic techniques along self-awareness, assertiveness, relaxation skills, exploration to gain insight, understanding and build coping mechanisms to manage those challenges. Being willing to seek counselling support is a sign of courage and willingness to improve one's functionality and live a more meaningful life.

Myth 6: Counselling involves strangers telling you how to solve your problems. Counsellors build a facilitative relationship with clients based on principles of trust, confidentiality, consent, empathy and unconditional positive regard along ethical boundaries. This means that by consulting with a Counsellor, you get a safe space to openly express your concerns without judgment with guarantee that your issues will remain confidential during and after the process.

Myth 7: Every faith/religious leader is a counsellor. Faith can cause healing or harm in therapy. Thus, it must be considered with care. While some faith/religious leaders may be trained as Pastoral Care Counsellors or Relationship & Marriage Counsellors, not every faith/religious leader is professionally trained and well equipped to provide every form of counselling service. It is therefore inappropriate to substitute specialised pro-faith care or guidance and support service for counselling.

Myth 8: Counsellors are all the same, they only take notes but are ineffective. Do we stop taking medication because we had concerns with one healthcare provider? Counselling is a systematic process where information is gathered from client for assessment, diagnosis and treatment. Thus, it involves an active participation by client in providing details to the counsellor for accurate diagnosis for treatment. If one counsellor is unable to help you, it is no reason to assume all others are the same. Several practitioners are available and can be of high benefit to address your needs.

Myth 9: Counselling will change your personality beyond recognition. If you undergo counselling, it is expected that some positive changes and modifications will occur in your thoughts, feelings and behaviour which will impact your life. This may mean letting go of some old unhealthy practices to pave way for new healthy ones. This does not change your personality but rather helps you rediscover yourself and be the best version of who you really are.

Myth 10: Counselling can be done by anyone. Family, friends or acquaintances may offer solicited or unsolicited opinion or support to help one overcome challenges based on common sense and logical reasoning but it is not counselling. Counselling delves deeper and involves using varied skills and techniques to systematically unveil hidden impulses and defense mechanisms by identifying the baseline event which has resulted in the occurrence of certain difficulties that make life unbearable for the client. Here, the client is able to uproot issues from the source and insightfully take independent decisions to resolve them by working with the Counsellor who is present until progress is made. Same cannot be said for others who provide opinions or advice and leaves one to deal with the consequences.

Myth 11: Group/Couple counselling makes one person look bad. Couples therapy is to provide partners equal chance to voice out their concerns to one another in a non-confrontational but honest environment. It is an opportunity to learn from each other and appreciate the issues causing disagreements in order to remedy the situation and repair it by themselves amicably. Group therapy helps individuals to learn and motivate each other to deal with similar challenges they may be battling with. These therapies are effective ways to make amends, unlearn unhealthy behaviours and build positive relationships.

Myth 12: Counselling is only for tragic experiences. Crisis Counselling often addresses existential challenges and disasters which occur abruptly and have the potential of causing depression, anxiety, trauma and psychological distress which may impair functioning when treatment is delayed. There are other forms of Counselling such as Preventive, Developmental and Facilitative Counselling which are equally beneficial to address other life issues besides tragic experiences.

Myth 13: Counselling will make everyone know I have a problem. Counselling is built on confidentiality and preservation of the right and dignity of the client. Thus, until a client reveals the details of his or her condition to others or gives explicit authorisation for same, counselling information remains strictly confidential. Clients can therefore, safely access counselling without fears of others gaining knowledge of their concerns. Any counsellor who violates confidentiality is liable for ethical violations and legal action.

Understand that Counselling is a process and it is suitable for all persons at every life stage based on certain fundamental assumptions. It facilitates the choice of the individual and enables one to think judiciously, evaluate self critically and understand oneself better. It is not thinking for the client, but thinking with the client; thus, Counsellors DO NOT GIVE ADVICE. Be mindful of the distinction between receiving guidance or advice as against undergoing professional counselling therapy.

As an individual who seeks counselling service, be sure there is no coercion. Willingly accept to undergo counselling or ensure proper consent is sought from you before the commencement of the counselling process. Also, verify to ensure that the counsellor is licensed. Never assume that anyone can be your counsellor based on some positive encounters you share with them. Counselling is beneficial for all persons at every stage of life; thus, no one needs to suffer or go through difficulties alone. In sum, counselling is a help profession and counsellors are always open to negotiate terms of service to ensure clients access the best support interventions in a timely, affordable and efficient manner.

Speak to a counsellor about that concern today and you will be amazed at the remarkable transformation and relief the service offers. Do share your concerns or questions with us if any via counsellorseyram@gmail.com.

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