Reflective Seeds by Counsellor Seyram

My story is one laced with bittersweet encounters but I have the will to share it because I believe others can have the courage to do what I couldn't do for myself and my future years ago. When I got married about thirty-nine (39) years ago, it was with the understanding that my husband will accept as his own, my daughter who was a toddler at the time. He assured me that he loved me and accepted to love and nurture my daughter as well.  He even insisted that I should stay at home while he worked to cater for the family.  In the beginning, I accepted his conditions not to work and we were a beautiful family open to welcome more children. He kept to his promise, at least for the first two years of the marriage and our home was peaceful. However, his sisters visited one day and discouraged him from taking care of my daughter who they labelled as another man's child. She was still but a little girl. Somehow, they managed to get him to neglect my daughter and he never reconsidered ...

I lost my virginity as a teenager through multiple rape but I couldn't tell anyone. It changed my life as I became suicidal. I felt worthless with nothing left to protect and I just wanted to die. I became timid and vulnerable; so, several men took advantage of me. By the time I was in my mid-twenties, about twenty (20) men including close male friends, distant relatives, colleagues from school, church and even some pastors took advantage of me sexually. I began to consider myself as being under a CURSE and constantly attempted suicide but failed. Eventually, I got married despite my family disapproval and many unresolved issues between myself and my partner. I just wanted to be married hoping the "curse" will be broken and I will be set free. Sadly, I realized soon after the marriage that I had made a terrible mistake. The "curse" was not broken and men still exploited me and had their way with me but my husband did not even care or protected me. I gradually w...