HEALING TOGETHER: “PREDATORS” IN LIFE ARE REAL, WATCH OUT.

I never thought I would have the courage to share this, but the lessons I have learnt might help someone else.

In my early thirties, I returned to school for graduate studies. I was single and focused — and I certainly didn’t expect that an academic environment would be a breeding ground for sexual predators.

I have kept myself for marriage. It’s not something I broadcast, but my innocence in this area tends to show. That year, I also lost my father. In my grief and vulnerability, I longed for someone who could fill that emotional gap. That, in hindsight, was my mistake.

Here’s the truth: accomplished older men are often drawn to younger women who admire them — especially those who appear vulnerable. Over time, four lecturers made sexual advances toward me. At first, I thought something must be wrong with me. I even went to therapy.

Therapy helped me see clearly: that some men are just predators. They target women who remind them of the dreams they once had — or the power they want to reclaim.

Here’s how to spot a predator:

  • They show deep interest in your goals and ask about your needs.
  • You start trusting them, thinking they genuinely care.
  • They share troubles in their marriage or career to get your sympathy.
  • They show up when it matters, offer advice or even financial help.
  • They ask about your background and slowly investigate your preferences.
  • One day it’s a hug “out of openness,” and the next — something inappropriate.
  • Your reaction at that moment will redefine the relationship.

As a Christian woman, I want to say this clearly: no verse or “God talk” justifies predatory behaviour. You answer to God, not to anyone who manipulates Scripture. Stay vigilant and don’t compromise your values for what I call “chicken change.” The disappointment cuts deep — but know this: they don’t care. Yes, even people who look like the pope can be predators.

Here’s what I have learnt:

  • I am stronger than I thought I was.
  • My femininity is a strength, not a weakness.
  • I am not to blame if a grown man can’t control himself. Shame on him.
  • Even younger men in authority can be predators. Be watchful.
  • Sex is sacred — honouring God and your future spouse is worth the sacrifice but it is your choice and duty to own and protect it.

If you have experienced something like this, I hope my story gives you the courage to speak up, stand tall, and walk in truth — for the sake of Christ and for yourself.

-         Shared by Nhyira


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